Change
by KaoriBeniko
Summary: N has gone on a journey to find answers, leaving Touko behind. Two years later, she has managed to cope in her own way. Change is inevitable, yet some things are worth preserving. Two-shot. Ferriswheelshipping.


_Well, maybe I'm a crook for stealing your heart away_

_Yeah, maybe I'm a crook for not caring for it_

_Yeah, maybe I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad person_

_Well, baby, I know._

* * *

Here. Right here it was. The moment she had prepared for years, it was finally here. Alder's last pokemon was falling down before her Serperior, unconscious. At last she was able to beat him. Touko was the new champion of Unova. In spite of his defeat, Alder smiled at her approvingly and announced in his usual loud voice: „Wow, you have become very strong. This battle made a fresh wind blow through my heart … Use the battle with me as a stepping stone and move forward!" Touko was overcome with pride at his words. „Oh course I will, Alder!", she promised in excitement. All the hard work over the years – It had finally payed off. She had accomplished this all on her own, well, not without help from her pokemon of course. She had proven to the world, and also to herself, that she was strong enough to be sovereign.

Elated to have won and relieved that she would be able to heal her pokemon soon, Touko ran towards Serperior and caught it in a tight embrace. "We finally did it, Serperior! I am so proud of you! You have become so strong and magnificent!" she saw the same pride in Serperiors eyes. It let out a happy scream, slinging its snake like body around Touko, as to thank her trainer. _All of you did a great job_, Touko thought in appreciation, eying the other pokeballs which hung on her belt. "You deserve a good rest as well, Serperior! We'll have a party later!" as soon as its trainer said this, the noble pokemon was being absorbed into her pokeball.

"It's apparent that you value your pokemon, Touko, seeing you with them makes me happy. You certainly are an unmatched talent in many ways! Come with me!", Alder said with a smile, gesturing Touko to follow him.

He led her up another stairs, which was not easily climbed after such a hard fight, but the remains of the adrenaline rush and hope for a warm bed gave Touko the strength to jog after the former Champ anyway. Besides, it was the greatest honor to be accepted into the Hall of Fame, a true once in a lifetime moment. There was no place for her tiredness now. It took two minutes at most for them to arrive in the glorious hall. It was illustrious and in far better state than the ancient hall they had just battled in.

"Touko ...", he spoke up "this is the Hall of Fame. A place where trainers and pokemon with true strength of heart and kindness are written into history." he gestured to a golden angularly shaped machine. "Please put your team on this platform, and their data will be saved. Along with your names, the memories of your journey, and the history of your battles. Everything that supports you in becoming even stronger than you are now! You and the pokemon partners you battled alongside will be recorded in this machine!" Touko listened respectively, letting Alder's words sink in. She didn't really want to have all of her memories saved, but she understood the metaphor. No reason to be rude and point that out.

Touko did as told and gently laid down the pokeballs onto the surface of the machine. "It will take just a few minutes for them to be registered," Alder said. "In the meantime, I would like to ask you something, Touko – were you planning on going back to, uhm, Nuvema Town was it?" "Yea, that's right, uhm … actually, I haven't thought about that. I guess I will. I haven't seen my mother in person for quite some time, and I've been traveling for ages, so I wouldn't really know where to stay, anyway." Touko shrugged. She didn't actually have plans, though. "Ah, I see. Well, I was about to offer you my apartment. Behind the Elite Four building there is another one where each of the Elite Four has their own residence. Being surpassed by you gives me a new opportunity to start another journey on my own, so I figured I could give you my flat so you can rest from your travels", Alder explained. "Wow, that's very generous of you!", Touko exclaimed. This was actually worth a thought. She made up her mind quickly: "You know what, I will gladly accept your offer, Alder! I could need some rest, but returning home would surely make my feet itchy, soon. I need some kind of... steady change of environment from all the traveling", the new Champ laughed lightly and scratched her head. No need telling Alder that she hadn't been planning on going home in the first place. After another minute, she took her pokemon from the platform and followed Alder back into the pokemon center of the League to discuss further details about their respective plans.

A few weeks had passed since then. Touko had moved just a few days after her conversation with Alder, sealing the deal, and on top of that she was exclusively – and generously – provided new furniture for her apartment. It was huge, providing enough space for a whole family. In this case: for herself and her pokemon team. She was content lately. There was a lot of space here, enough time to think, to plan new strategies, and the best part was that the Victory Road was just around the corner. She spent a lot of time training there.

Sometimes she went just for a walk at night, which was the case at the moment. Sometimes she practically took her whole team for a walk, sometimes swapping one pokemon or two so that she wasn't alone. Over two years ago she had gotten her first pokemon and still she refused to walk out into the wilderness without at least a single pokemon. This time she had picked Glazeon, who was relatively new to her team. At this time at night it was usually very quiet, but whenever Touko happened to meet a trainer in hopes of challenging the Elite Four, she just defeated them beforehand to show them they had yet to become stronger.

There had been a time when defeating other trainers had given the young Champ a bad conscience, especially since she was still getting stronger by the day. She didn't know when she had started changing, but … at some point she just didn't care anymore. So she was becoming an authority to others, what was the deal? Wasn't it nice of her to show trainers that they weren't ready for the Elite Four yet, when she beat them exclusively? Still, most of them considered her actions unfair. Even the Elite Four disapproved of this. Rather, they found that everyone should have their shot at trying to fight them, a least to see how far they'd come.

But who else would be bothered anyway, there weren't any friends around, let alone family members, who could lecture her about it. She hadn't met anyone, literally, in months. Because as long as Serperior and the others were still happy with her and accepted her as family, she was fine. Even Zekrom was staying with her. They had bonded very fast, actually. The dragon sometimes needed its freedom, it was occasionally allowed to fly out for a few hours, sometimes days, but it had always returned. Touko was glad that the legendary pokemon still respected her. It made her really proud. She knew that Zekrom wasn't bound to her, even though she had caught it, so she was glad that it chose to stay.

As she stood there and deliberated, the night appeared to become much quieter and cold. Touko decided to return home for the night. She felt restless somehow, edgy. Everything was starting to become so familiar to her already, nearly boring. The mountain had appeared huge to her, once, could it have been just a month ago that she had climbed it since Team Plasma's defeat? Now that she could navigate through it so easily, it wasn't special anymore. As was the forest, and most of the pokemon that lived by the Victory Road. Touko tried her best to focus only on trainers while training, but defeating one or two Boldore once in a while couldn't be helped. As a result, the pokemon were beginning to be afraid of her and hid. It was such a shame.

Maybe Touko just wasn't made to stay in one place for too long, maybe she was some kind of _bad inhabitant_. "Let's go, Glazeon, I'm tired", she curtly said to the graceful ice pokemon who was busy observing something in the scrubs. Touko loved Glazeon very much, but she started to miss her cuddly Ducklett or Ninetale's warm fur at the moment. It really was time to return inside. The sky was already black.

Touko carefully followed the path through the extensive cave she had memorized over the past weeks. It was still risky getting lost in the maze of the Victory Road at this hour, but she made it through, along with Glazeon, who was alert at all times. After a few minutes, they found the final stairs that led to the great hall of the Elite Four. The young trainer longed for some rest, and she assumed that her companion felt the same. Nevertheless, as they stood right in the middle of the hall, Touko didn't feel like going to her apartment yet. Something was pushing her in another direction.

The Elite Four Hold was a magical place, it was nice living here, but ever since Alder had made this offer to his successor, one thought had been subconsciously nagging at the back of her mind: This building was still connected to N's castle.

It was absurd that Touko allowed herself to form this thought only now, since it was _so obvious_. The stairs leading to the castle was basically driven right through the dome and Touko had not checked it out once. Deep down she knew why that was. But as of late, she managed to automatically block these thoughts from her mind. Still, this time curiosity was taking the better of her. She didn't know why she was at all worried about going into the castle. No one ever went there. Her feet automatically moved, the actual entrance wasn't all too easy to find for the lack of light at the moment, but she crossed the hall and soon found the huge crack with the even huger stairs looming out of it, leading to the enormous building before her.

The sight of it was surreal. The manor was huge, glorious, and above all ... it was just still there! And it still had about ten floors, over towering the construction Touko just came from. A hundred memories and feelings tugged at her mind and heart, but she wouldn't let them through. The main thing was, Zekrom came to her at this place, marking the moment she had become an independent and strong trainer officially, ready to train for the defeat of the Champion. And this gave her the courage to revisit this place now. She worriedly looked at the stairs. The ground below it couldn't even be seen. Well, Glazeon could help her if she fell. "What do you think, Glazeon. Shall we do this?", while she spoke to the beautiful creature next to her, Touko realized that she hadn't actually spoken to it the whole evening. And she sensed that Glazeon noticed it to be a strange behavior for her trainer. Anyways, it nodded to Touko and the two of them proceeded into the castle. Glazeon knew her too well so question her sudden interest. It was too patient with Touko.

Neither minded the spiral stairs that were first to be taken, the several rooms to be crossed. Every step echoed endlessly in each hall, and somewhere along the way, Touko grew tired of all the running before she would finally explore the actual castle. They arrived on the first floor eventually. After all the impatient running, Touko found herself halting abruptly. This was a lot to register. Though she tried her best to block it, she was overcome by the feeling that she didn't belong here. She was to turn around and wordlessly return into her quarters. But it had been such a long way, and she had taken Glazeon all the way here ... "I'm sorry, Glazeon, can you hold on a little longer?", Touko whispered.

This place felt so intimidating. "Please, stay with me", Touko continued without looking at Glazon. She finally did though, when it nuzzled its delicate snout against her trainer's leg. It was comforting, so Touko took the time to kneel down and scratch her partner behind its large ear. "You know, I love you, Glazeon.", she commented in a sudden emotional moment, but stood up quickly again, for she couldn't stand her pokemon's perceptive stare. It made Touko hurry even further into the castle. She didn't want to think. She didn't want to. She just tried to push it away with all of her might. Because in truth, in actual truth, this was not about exploring the castle. What was she supposed to do here, looking for items she could have overlooked or something like that? No. She was heading for _his room_. She knew she was. And the further she proceeded, the faster her steps became. And the more -

Her throat restricted, her muscles began to tense, she was slowly breaking a sweat – until she stood directly in front of that door.

Touko slowly moved to open it. It took a little force to turn the doorknob around, which obviously hadn't been used in years. The young trainer was hit yet again by a wave of impressions. A rush of an all too familiar smell was crawling into her nose, mixed with the sensation of insipid air. Opening the door brought a gust with it, moving the air around, slightly raising the dust.

It was the same sight Touko had had two years ago. This place was still huge. Strangely familiar, but at the same time - lifeless. Involuntarily, it left her wondering how much time exactly he had to spend here as a child. This room was still radiating innocence and melancholy, but demonstrated abandonment. Everything was just the way she remembered; there was a half pipe stretched right through the middle of the area. Several toys were strewn around, left untouched for ages. The only thing different was that the little electronic train had stopped moving.

The interior was as colorful, but a dull layer was forming. An invisible layer which had bleached out some of the playfulness of the room. Touko didn't dare move, afraid to ruin the scene with her presence. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Glazeon sniff curiously. While its trainer was still rooted in the doorway to take everything in, the sly ice pokemon dared creeping towards a box filled with games, nudging them. After another wary minute, Touko set a foot forward, then the other. Her hesitant steps lead her straight forward, towards the big half pipe in the center of the room. She felt a light ache in her chest, the uncomfortable feeling of being a stranger was settling inside again. She wasn't able to breathe properly.

The young woman sat down on the lowest spot of the half pipe. She had yet to figure out what she was doing here exactly, what she was hoping to find in this empty place, brimming with memories she wanted to wipe out. She was nervous, yet she couldn't resist coming here ...

The confusion had her tearing her hair in exasperation. Why was she so bound to this place, what had led her here? N wasn't here anymore, he wouldn't return for some time, maybe ever, and even if he would, she had sworn to herself not to contact him.

_What reason was there, anyway?_

On the day of his departure he had held quite a long speech about her becoming stronger and his will to leave fast to find answers. Yet his abrupt takeoff had left her gotten rid of. This she had realized during the time he was gone. Originally though, she had wanted to stop him from leaving. But of course, she never got her chance to try, and it was her own fault. She hadn't been able to. His abrupt proclamation to leave had her so startled, so _frightened _that she had missed her move.

Looking back, she felt quite idiotic. She wasn't even sure of the motivation for such an act. How could she have explained her plea for him to stay? They had met each other on their respective journey, merely crossing paths so to say, so what had made her think he was going to stay with her? Mainly, what did it even add up to - that they would live together? _Good god, just screw that_, he scolded herself mentally, embarrassed even before herself. The fact that she wasn't able to stop him was the only thing important. _What an evidence of incapacity_.

At the end of the day she had lost contact to several friends throughout her travels, since she wanted to become independent, growing tired of commitment. But this very room was the only place she had returned to. And it had nothing to do with it being around the corner. She could have visited her mother just as easily.

Touko couldn't deny that she had become stronger mainly through her encounters with N, making it possible to achieve independence from her mother's experience and care, and now, she had her own experience to look back on. Touko had become Champion without any advice from her mother.

But that didn't make her old plans to be with N any less ridiculous.

She silently called Glazeon to cuddle a little bit. The melancholic atmosphere had to be getting to her. The called pokemon was by her side in an instant, looking at her trainer with big, trusting eyes. Normally, Glazeon's trust in her calmed Touko. Not this time.

And there, she felt it.

It was getting hot. She was getting very hot, and ran cold in the same instant. An unnerving vibe was spreading, potently growing through the air. An unnerving jolt stroke through her body, causing the hairs on the back of her neck to stand up. It ran through her from her fingertips down to the toes, back again, until it held her heart in a tight grip. Touko let out a sharp gasp when she realized that there were footsteps in the distance. Without moving or even looking, she knew whom they came from.

N was on his way home.

* * *

Phew! How thrilling!

And hey there! Don't mind me, I just wanted to add that you can find the cover of this story on deviantart (/zorome).

I illustrate my fan fictions myself, so if you happened to have a request, feel free to PN me! Either on or deviant art. :)

Also, a few words to this two-shot: I had this story planned as a one shot, but I underestimated my need to describe and explain things, so I split it - at least into a prologue (which is 3000 words, anyway) and the rest of the story.

The idea to write an ff about N's departure is nothing new, but I tried to go about this a different way. I tend to over analyze everything, and the same goes for my ffs, which is why they are relatively long. But some stories you can't tell with only 1000 words, even if they take place in limited locations - like this one. I just wanted to have every aspect, every thought, and every scenario brought up, as to suggest a realistic approach. It still gets corny, but, anyway. I am of the opinion that someone who's been left by someone they were fond of would be sad and depressed in every case, but: They can either admit it or deny it and be bitchy about it. And I think that Touko has that right. She has the right to change and become imperfect (though we all love her!) for her sadness. Touko has the right to be a bitch. That's the message of this story! I hope you're still excited for chapter 2! :D


End file.
